yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
Randomize
