How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
I have grass duct taped all over my body
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
