We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
Randomize