i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
