at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Randomize