I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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