It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
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