Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
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