I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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