well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
you didnt know i had herpes?
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
Randomize
