their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
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