ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
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