is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
Randomize
