I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize