Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Randomize