Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
