I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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