we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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