Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
Randomize
