Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
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