Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
Randomize
