i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Randomize
