Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
porn star boner night. come get it.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
Randomize
