i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
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