everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
Randomize
