i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
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