How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
Randomize