in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
Randomize
