We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
Randomize