After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize