I hate your face
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
Randomize
