You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
Last time i carry you out of a forest
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
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