what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
So apparently I’m into choking now
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