I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize
