I just made out with a guy for $7.
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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