operation have a gay friend backfired
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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