Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
Randomize
