and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
Randomize
