If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
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