Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
I think my nap took me to another dimension
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
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