Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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