i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
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