You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
My lawyer watched my DUI video. Said of the thousand or so he's seen, mine was one of the top ten best.
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
He did a backflip because drugs
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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