I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize
