Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
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