She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
