we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
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