Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Randomize