I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
Randomize