For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
Randomize
