I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Randomize
